Chapter 14 of 17
Unspoken expectations are pre-meditated resentments. Lead by saying them out loud.
Reflect
Answer honestly — your responses save to this device only. There are no right answers, only true ones.
What expectation am I holding her to that I've never actually told her?
Where am I comparing her to my mom, an ex, or a fantasy — and is that fair?
Where am I expecting her to read my mind?
What expectation of MINE has gone unmet — and is it actually realistic?
What season is she in that I need to recalibrate my expectations around?
What expectation has she exceeded that I've never thanked her for?
Act
Pick one. Do it before Sunday. Check it off when it's done.
Discuss
These prompts are designed for connection — not debate. Listen more than you talk.
Each finish: 'I wish you understood that I really need…'
Talk about: 'Where are we comparing our marriage to others?'
Trade: 'One expectation of mine you can quietly let go.'
"Speak the expectation. Adjust the expectation. Or release it. But never weaponize it."